An AP story today announces the birth of Xenu-approved Cruise/Holmes love child, a bouncing baby girl. (At any rate, she's bouncing if her father's Oprah antics are any indication of her genetically predestined behavioral patterns.) The girl is named "Suri," which apparently means either "princess" or "red rose," depending on whether you listen to the filthy Jews or their ancient enemies, the despicable Persians.
The story is notable for its unblushing misuse of the word "ironically":
Ironically, Suri was born the same day as Brooke Shields' newborn daughter, Grier Hammond Henchy.
Shields and Cruise had a public spat last year after he criticized the actress for taking antidepressants following the birth of her first child.
Appearing on the "Today" show, Cruise said there was no such thing as chemical imbalances that need to be corrected with drugs, and that depression could be treated with exercise and vitamins.
In addition to proving that Cruise (like all Scientologists since their fearless leader, L. Ron, Hubbard, first started stalking maternity wards in search of that which he might consume) is utterly batspit insane, this little excerpt shows just what kind of a deplorable state mainstream writing is in. How on earth can "coincidentally" morph into "ironically" in such a clearly unacceptable way? I blame Alanis Morissette (may her Canadian soul be haunted by really awesome pirate ghosts).